“Living with a man and unmarried; am I still a Christian?”

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  • My Mother was a born again Christian and she lived by the word of God. Was she perfect no. But her heart was for God. I remember when she use to have conversations with her friends and they would talk about their faith. When anyone was unsure about a situation . She would say What does the word of God say about the situation. God speaks to us in many ways. If it lays heavy on your heart then you know what you have to do. No man can guide you and give you advice, thus they see it through their eyes and not Gods. Taking action in sin does not make you non Christian only your lack of faith and removing God from your heart can do that. We also must trust in God and his ways. If you are struggling you pray on it and as you already know, he will answer you. If something lays heavy on your heart you already know your answer.

    • Nicole Andrew

      Hi Analaigh!🙋🏾‍♀️

      Strong response as well, thank you. The terms of my engagement are a bit complicated but you are right, I know my conscience won’t be completely clean until I walk down that aisle!

      In the meantime, I or we rather, should continue to grow as Christians by His grace and holy spirit.

      A friend who read this article also asked me ‘who am I a Christian for?’. It must be for others and not just a title, and I must always strive to be Christ-like in all I do as an example to those watching.

      Thanks for your time,

      Nicole
      x

      • No problem. Nice to read about people and their willingness to open up especially when it comes to Christianity. It is not easy trying not to be of the world when you live in the world. God Bless my Sis you will make it through.

        • Nicole Andrew

          Bless you also Analaigh, thank you!

          And you are definitely not wrong there! It’s not easy, but as they say, one should never tire of fighting the good fight!

          Take good care,

          Nicole
          x

    • Anu

      YESS! What the link to your blog?

  • TishaJayy

    I really enjoyed reading this post and LOVED the transparency even more. I personally don’t think it’s other people’s place to pass judgement on your situation because at the end of the day they’re not God and they’re supposed to be building you up. I get that they’re maybe trying to hold accountable but accountability does not equate to condemning someone you care about. Keep on doing you, building your relationship with God and don’t let people’s opinions make you loose who you are xx

    • Nicole Andrew

      Thank you TishaJayy!😇

      I’m glad you enjoyed my post, I appreciate your comments! You’re right, we all have to do what’s right for us and our own personal situations, only the man above can judge.

      Take care and thank you for reaching out!

      Nicole
      x

  • Anu

    Hey Nicole! Good read with a fresh vibe to the blog.

    DEEP TOPIC THOUGH!

    Firstly, in addition to the above definitions (in which I would put in brackets) – If you believe with faith that Jesus Christ died for your sins – You are a Christian. Well that’s my primary understanding of it all. Unless I need to go back to the Word.

    Secondly, when I read this post the verse that came to mind right away was Genesis 2:24: Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

    Now everyone has their own understanding and interpretation of that verse. Most of our older generation and Christians who take the Word very literally will frown upon the act of living with someone living with their significant other.

    In my opinion this verse doesn’t highlight to me that you living with a man, your fiancé is a sin. It has been said that you are single until married..so technically you living with a man (who is also single) where there is an emotional connection – great!

    The problem starts when a unmarried couple living together to do the acts of a marriage couple for instance sex, produce babies and so on. Without me dropping verses – I’m sure y’all know that is a sin.
    In todays society, its almost impossible for the opposite sexes to live together and not have sexual interaction which could be the reason as why the frowns are around. People don’t know what goes on behind closed doors they assume the worst.

    So what do I think? Spiritually and in terms of their relationship with God, everyone is on a difference level. I couldn’t live with my fiancé. I won’t be as peace. As much as it would give me a head start to find out the irritating habits that he may have – we would also be having sex….we’ll be sinning and praying in that same un-marital bed lol.
    Genesis 2:24 and other verses to me is like a guide that sets boundaries between my lover and I so that we don’t fall into that temptation. I have heard too many stories where Christian lovers took a mutual decision to do the acts of a marriage couple. A few months down the line the man told his woman (or vise versa) that he has to leave her as he feels like he is backsliding.

    Just make sure you are at peace in every decision you make – the Holy Spirit is leading you!

    • Nicole Andrew

      Hi Anu 👋🏾

      Very deep response, thank you! Everything you said totally makes sense, it’s hard out here sometimes! Thank you for not passing harsh judgement, I appreciate the views given.

      As you all have so greatly highlighted (I agree with your given description also!), I am indeed a Christian and so is my better half. I just need to focus on my relationship with God and cutting out all the background noise. And of course making us official and getting that ring!

      Thanks for your time,

      Nicole
      x

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